I don’t know about you but when I decide that something is in the past, that’s where it needs to stay. If I decide that it needs to be done with, then I do it and don’t look back. And that generally, goes for everything I do.
I don’t want you in my life, I make sure you’re not in it. You push me away and I make sure to do exactly that.
Here’s a lesson on ‘Grieving 101’:
- Denial & Isolation: it’s a normal reaction, a defense mechanism. You need it to rationalize overwhelming emotions.
- Anger: oh this one! reality hits and we’re not ready for it. We start to express emotion through anger. We resent the person for causing us pain. And sometimes, because we cannot get angry directly with that person, we take it on family and friends, sometimes complete strangers and guess what? … sometimes even inanimate objects. (yep. that came as a surprise to me too!). Mood swings. Guilt for feeling angry which only leads to… more anger.
- Bargaining: if only… but what if we try… let’s give it another go and change this and that. Sometimes, we secretly make a pact with God or sell our soul to the Devil just for one more chance. Generally, in vain. Cos it ain’t going anywhere…
- Depression: subtle. sometimes. A quiet preparation for the final stage. A more private affair of sorts. But not always.
- Acceptance: Ah! when you finally get to put an end to it. You start to find you path again, enjoying the little things and realizing that maybe (just maybe!), life is not so bad. The world didn’t end and you’re still alive and in one piece (kinda).
If they come back, do yourself a favor: don’t do it!
It’s ok. You’re welcome.